There comes a time in everyone’s sobriety when a love interest will come into their life. Sometimes they could be fishing for someone or this love interest could suddenly show up in a meeting when they least expect it. Then there is the question of whether or not they should be dating in the first place and what they should do about it since there is an underlying stipulation of not dating in the first year of sobriety. Before you allow any infatuation to occur, you should get to the bottom of what is right for you in your recovery program.
Although there are no rules in recovery only suggestions, it is still wise to look at why a year is the measuring point of when relationships are considered more beneficial. Getting sober is difficult enough without adding a new relationship to the mix during an already emotional time during early sobriety. Most people in general cannot handle the ups and downs in relationship and someone who is newly sober could be jeopardizing their sobriety for love or lust. By staying sober for 365 days and all the holidays too, gives you enough time to grow in your recovery and prove that you can stay sober through most anything.
Talking to your sponsor or your therapist about this subject would be a good idea for you. A relationship may seem like a normal rite of passage for where you think you are in your life when in reality you may be procrastinating on an important part of your program that could affect your relationship with your partner. The recommendation is that you work all your steps first and your partner does too so that you both can grow continue to grow together rather than grow apart.
The saying goes that “opposites attract” but where your addiction recovery is concerned you must be believe in the same things. This does not mean that you must be doing the exact same things. This just means that you have the same mentality when it comes to the powerlessness of the addiction at hand. Without the same beliefs, one of you could slip putting the other at a bigger risk of losing their sobriety as well.
Relationships in sobriety are to be celebrated especially since you may not have been able to have any while you were deep in your addiction. The main thing to remember is that you have to put your sobriety first to keep everything else – including a new relationship with a love interest.
If you or someone you know has a problem with drugs and alcohol, The Kimberly Center has a treatment plan that will work just for you. Our evidence-based therapies are designed to last a lifetime and can help you to build a foundation in recovery.
Call us today to begin: 855-4-KCENTER (855-452-3683)