You have probably heard the famous phrase by Teddy Roosevelt that states, “Comparison is the thief of all joy.” However, you might not realize how true this statement really is. When you compare yourself to others, you use your energy to overlook the good in your own life and wish for what someone else has. It is easy to do, and anyone can find themselves doing it regardless of age, background, and gender. 

It typically begins when you are little and another child might have a toy that you want. Then when you get older, you may be jealous of another person’s appearance, job, partner, car, home, or even how many friends they have. 

With social media being so commonly used, it can be even more challenging to avoid self-comparison. Since comparison can take a significant toll on mental health, it is essential to learn how to make it a habit to avoid it and instead learn to practice gratitude. 

The Dark Side of Comparison 

Self-comparison does not only steal joy from your life, but it is also linked to other unpleasant consequences. There are many reasons to stop this practice. For example: 

• Comparison steals your time. You have only 24 hours in a day, and it is up to you how to spend them. Why waste precious time wanting what someone else has when you could be focused on bettering yourself or working towards achievements of your own? 
• There is no limit to the number of comparisons you make. You may start comparing yourself over more significant things like your coworker’s promotion, but once you get into the habit of it, you may find yourself unable to hold back from comparing yourself over the little things that do not matter, like how they dress or style their hair. 
• Comparison can lead to resentment. When you are constantly comparing yourself to someone, you may unintentionally harbor a grudge against them despite having done nothing wrong, leading to strained relationships. This practice can even cause you to resent yourself or your own life circumstances. 
• Everyone is on a different path in life, and each person’s circumstances vary. It is not rational to compare where you are in life to someone who has had more time, experience, or help along the way. 
• You never know what people are going through that they do not share publicly. You may be comparing yourself to someone who seems to have everything but, in reality, is suffering silently. 
• There is nothing to gain from comparison. Unless you are using someone’s success to motivate or inspire you, you are simply draining your own energy. 

Tips to Stop Comparing Yourself 

If you have a bad habit of comparing yourself to others, it is time to make a change. When you do, you will likely find that your mental health improves significantly. Some tips to stop comparing yourself include: 

• Try to be more aware of your thoughts. If you find that you are beginning to compare yourself to someone else, stop and change the direction of your thoughts. Instead, think of something you have accomplished recently that you are proud of or something you are grateful for in your life. 
• Start recognizing the parts of life that are not measured in the same way traditional success is measured. Perhaps you are not yet where you want to be financially, but you are rich in the love you receive from friends and family members. Additionally, things like loyalty, generosity, and compassion for one another are some of the most extraordinary things to experience and celebrate. When you begin to focus on these things, you may find that you have a lot more to appreciate in life than you once thought. 
• Start practicing gratitude. To further incorporate gratitude into everyday life, you may consider keeping a gratitude journal. Each night before going to bed, or when waking up in the morning, try writing down three things you are grateful for. This can help shift your perspective on life and gain a greater sense of appreciation for simple things. 
• Take note of your own successes. When someone is caught up in the habit of comparison, they may be so focused on what other people are doing that they are not taking the time to celebrate their own accomplishments. Celebrate your accomplishments, even the small ones, and do not be afraid to tell others about them. 
• Take a break from social media. It is so easy to forget that applications like Instagram and Facebook portray only the highlights of a person’s life. It does not show the bad days, boring days, or the struggles someone is going through. Consider doing a social media detox. 

It is very easy to fall into the habit of comparing yourself to others. This is a practice that starts at a young age and can carry on into adulthood. You may find yourself comparing your own appearance to others or wishing you are where someone else is professionally. This practice of comparing is not only harmful, but it is a way to drain your energy, steal your own joy, and overlook the good that you have to appreciate in your own life. If you struggle with self-comparison, consider trying to retrain your thoughts. When you find yourself wishing for what someone else has, stop and consider what you have to appreciate in your own life. Learning to end self-comparison can do wonders for your mental health. At The Kimberly Center, we want to help you live the life you deserve. Call (855) 452-3683 today.