With the New Year comes the chance to start living the life you deserve. What better way to start the New Year than by leaving unhealthy relationships in the past and starting off fresh? People stay in unhealthy relationships for a great variety of reasons. Sometimes it is because they don’t believe that they deserve better. 

Unhealthy relationships can lead to mental health problems like anxiety and depression. They can also lead to low self-esteem and even thoughts of suicide. Many people turn to drugs and alcohol as a way to cope and end up falling into even deeper problems. It is important to know how to take the necessary steps to leave a toxic relationship while ensuring that you do so as safely as possible. This is crucial for your overall well-being and survival. 

Understanding Why People Stay In Unhealthy Relationships

If someone hasn’t personally experienced a toxic relationship, they may pass judgment on someone in that situation. They may ask, “Why are they doing this to themselves?” However, at the end of the day, it’s never that simple. The specific reasons why an individual may choose to stay in a toxic relationship are very personal and different for everyone. However, there are still three common examples of why people remain in these harmful situations. 

#1. The Unhealthy Relationship Resembles What They’re Used To 

Unfortunately, many people grow up in unsafe, toxic home environments where there may be violence, abuse, and other dangerous behavior. They may have watched their parent be subjected to abuse at the hands of their partner, whether that abuse occurred mentally, physically, or emotionally. 

If you’ve never seen an example of a healthy, loving relationship between two romantic partners, then it would be difficult to know what a strong relationship is supposed to look like. Moreover, if you’ve witnessed a parent tolerate mistreatment, you may be more likely to do the same in your relationship. 

#2. They Believe the Relationship Is All They Can Attain

Another reason that some people stay in abusive relationships is that they don’t believe they are deserving of love. This could also be related to reasons dating back to childhood. They could have been abused and neglected by their parents. Moreover, they may lack a clear concept of what it’s like to receive real love. 

This can also be the result of manipulation at the hands of a toxic partner. In order to prevent an individual from leaving them, some toxic people will tear down their partner by critiquing everything from their looks to their self-worth. The toxic person can get in their partner’s head and convince them that if they leave them, they will find someone else who loves them. 

In their mind, the individual can come to believe that their partner is right. They decide to stay, believing that being alone would be worse than the situation they are currently in. 

#3. They Lack Resources and Outside Support

Unfortunately, another reason why some people don’t leave toxic relationships is that they simply don’t have anywhere else to go. They may not be financially stable and could face homelessness if they leave their partner. It’s also possible that they don’t live near family or friends or don’t have other people in their life to turn to. 

Taking Steps to Leave an Unhealthy Relationship

The first step in planning to leave an unhealthy relationship is acknowledging to yourself that the situation you are in is unhealthy and you deserve better. This may be difficult to come to grips with, especially if you have lingering feelings for your partner. However, it’s necessary to recognize that you deserve happiness and respect. 

The next thing that you should do if you’re planning to leave an unhealthy relationship is to tell someone. This is especially the case if you’re in a relationship where violence is occurring, and you may be putting yourself in danger if your partner finds out. Tell a family member, friend, counselor, or law enforcement member about your plans. This way, they can be standing by to help you in whatever way you need. 

Moreover, make sure you know where you’ll be living. If you’re not financially stable and can’t stay with a friend or family member, there are shelters available for other women who are in the same situation as you. These resources can provide you with safe housing where your partner will not be able to contact you. 

It can help to slowly begin packing your belongings and moving them to a secure location. This is so you won’t have to worry about moving them after informing your partner that you’re leaving. You also want to be sure that you don’t run the risk of your partner damaging or destroying your belongings in retaliation. 

A lot of people stay in toxic relationships for months or even years. This can be due to many different reasons. They may not have seen healthy relationships growing up and don’t know what real love and respect are supposed to look like. They may have been manipulated by their partner or convinced they don’t deserve any better. Furthermore, they may not have a place to live and face homelessness if they leave. In reality, everyone deserves to be respected and treated well. If you’re planning to leave, make sure that you tell someone so that you can be as safe as possible. If you’re struggling with substance misuse, The Kimberly Center can help. Call (855) 452-3683 today.